Love and Alcohol Addiction in St. George
It is not always easy to love an addict. Even if they are trying to recover from their addiction, your relationship may be fraught with problems and challenges, especially if the addict spirals downward before they break their bad habits. Not to mention, that sometimes you can even become addicted to making them better. Whatever the case, it can be a high-risk proposition for both of you.
If you are in love with someone suffering from alcohol addiction in St. George, Lion’s Gate Recovery staff wants you to know that we are here to help. Call us anytime. In the meantime, here are a few things you should know right from the start, and 11 observations from people who have been in your shoes.
If the person you love is in the grips of alcohol addiction in St. George, you need to understand that addiction is not a “bad habit,” it is an illness. Also, addicts come from all walks of life. They are scientists, teachers, artists, and stay-at-home moms. They are often called evil, wicked, and immoral, but in truth, they are usually just ordinary people with a debilitating sickness.
If they do not recover, individuals develop an addiction can lose their jobs, families, and homes. They may even end up spending time in prison if they do not obey laws. In the beginning of the addiction, they may seem like they are functioning in society, but eventually, they cannot keep up with day-to-day activities or maintain relationships. What’s more, addicts can overdose, which can lead to an untimely death.
Risks to You
When somebody loves an addict, they usually want to help them because they understand that the person they love is having difficulty fighting the disease on their own. However, helping an addict that you are emotionally involved with is dangerous. Individuals that want to help addicts get better can become obsessed with the process of recovery, since thinking about the situation can occupy all of their waking moments and can even make them lose sleep at night. Plus, since they may see the person they love endure emotional and physical pain, they can get caught up in a similar type of pain and end up hurting right along with them.
Another problem is that you may find yourself excessively worrying about all sorts of things. For example, you may become concerned that other people don’t understand you at all, since your friends and family may advise you to not help the addict, especially if they think you are becoming overwhelmed by the recovery process or you are going in a downward spiral along with the addict.
11 Observations That Can Help You Cope with Alcohol Addiction in St. George
The following facts and insights can help you maintain your sanity while loving a person that has addictive tendencies:
Two Distinct Personalities. It can help to understand that the person you love and the addict that is running the show are almost two separate beings. You can love the sober person, but end up despising the addict, since they often display two very different personalities.
Recognize The Truth. Accepting the fact that your loved one is an addict is crucial to moving forward in the recovery process. Pretending that the problem does not exist will not improve the situation. You are wise to understand that there are elements of living with an addict that will leave you powerless. No matter the type of addiction, from over-consuming alcohol to over-eating food, it’s important to understand there is a real problem.
Learn Healthy Ways to Love. Loving an addict does not mean you need to agree to all of their requests. In fact, it is smart to determine how to make healthy choices for yourself first, and then decide how to help the addict. For instance, resolve to set restrictions on what you will do and how far you will go to help. Also remember to take care of yourself by eating healthy foods, exercising and socializing.
Remember To Relax. Do not attempt to make choices or decisions for the addict you love, since they are in charge of their lives and need to make decisions for themselves. The best thing you can do is make high-quality choices for yourself.
Avoid the Blame Game. It is pointless to blame them for your unhappiness. The best thing you can do is take a look at yourself to see if you have played a part in the addiction. For example, don’t give them money that you know will be spent on furthering their addiction.
Avoid Enabling Behaviors. Many individuals believe that they can help keep an addict they love out of trouble by giving them a place to sleep or putting food on the table. However, when addicts are not responsible for themselves, they tend to fall back into their bad habits. Instead, help the addict you love by encouraging them to find resolutions to the difficulties in their lives.
Be Strong. Whenever you go along with an addict that has lied, stolen, or uses anger or sickness in order to get his or her way, you are not helping them get better. Instead, you empower the addict to keep using the people they care about for their addictive needs. A better tactic is to stand up for yourself and do what you know is right. Eventually, they will realize they can count on you to do the right thing.
Don’t Become Dependent. Look closely at yourself to determine if you have become reliant on the addict’s need for your help. In fact, it is wise to examine your reasons for enabling an addict, especially if you find you are using them to make you feel like a better person. It might be difficult to break away from your enabling habits, but if you continue on with it, it can only hurt both of you.
Put Yourself First. If you do not take care of yourself first, you cannot empower the addict you love to live a better life. Plus, putting yourself first means that you value yourself enough to take care of all of your needs, making sure your body and soul is healthy on all levels.
Create A Life You Love. Look for areas in your life to improve. For example, you may need to search for a new job that you find interesting. Or, you might need to find a hobby that excites you, whether it’s hiking or teaching children how to read. You also may want to find friends that you enjoy and that make you laugh. Create a life that makes you want to jump out of bed in the morning.
It’s Okay To Ask For Help. If you feel overwhelmed by the situation, don’t hesitate to ask for professional help. If you love somebody that suffers from alcohol addiction in St. George, you are not alone. There are people who have been in your shoes. There are people that understand what you’re going through right now and who can offer good advice on how to cope. Please don’t hesitate to reach out for help.